Children and adult timetables!
Before having children we’re accustomed to the order of our modern lives and careers. When we become parents our logical worlds are thrown into a tailspin. Babies and children don’t fit neatly into adult timetables.⠀
Many mainstream parenting experts recommend strict routines, scheduled feedings, punishments, threats and other disrespectful techniques. From a logical, pre-baby point of view this may sound like a great idea. After all, when we feel out of control, having a plan makes us feel calm and grounded, putting us back in the driver’s seat. But this is a flawed plan based on fear. Fear of the unknown. Fear of what life could look like if we follow our children’s leads.⠀
Before having kids, it’s dangerously easy to assume we’re on top of things, but parenting swiftly reminds us we’re not. The sudden realization that we can’t control everything can be terrifying. But, when our children push us to our limits and we’re lost and uneasy we find out who we really are. They are our metaphorical reflections pushing us to ask ourselves tough questions we may not wish to answer. Yet, if we dare to be honest with ourselves and our children we revitalize our souls and reawaken the child in all of us.⠀
In spite of my passionate enthusiasm for gaining a deep understanding of infant psychology and child development at some point knowledge gives out and we must bravely venture into uncertainty, ambiguity and fear. Yet, the opposite of knowledge isn’t always ignorance; it can be wonder, mystery and possibility.⠀
In life, the things we don’t know can push us forward so much more than the those we do know. And it is in these moments that natural parenting shines. Why? Because our instincts take over. They guide us. They allow us to slow dance with our children, to instinctively know what they need, without knowing why. As parents, we’re only as strong as our willingness to surrender. To be the branch bending in the breeze rather than breaking as we shed preconceived ideals and accept our children aren’t as described in a book; they’re infinitely more alive, interesting and real.
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