Does Your Child Struggle With Boundaries?
Hey conscious parents!
Does your child struggle with boundaries?
One of the greatest gifts we can give our children is teaching them to respect, develop, and set boundaries at an early age.
Before we can discuss how to teach our children about boundaries we need to understand that the foundation for boundaries is a secure attachment.
When our child knows that their needs will be met consistently and in a timely manner they are more likely to understand boundaries.
That’s not to say they will happily agree with our boundaries. They will protest, as would we, if we had a limit placed around something we wanted but despite the boundary our child understands that...
They are loved no matter what.
Without the security of a nurturing relationship a child learns to create unhealthy boundaries by avoiding their needs or trying to get their needs met in ways that we as parents find frustrating!
Our child doesn’t need perfection. We will have days where we are not able to meet every need, so let yourself off the hook of needing to be perfect.
Consistent and timely is key.
Let’s look at a couple examples on fostering secure attachment.
⛔ Dad frustrated with lack of sleep locks his child in the bedroom.
✅ Dad frustrated with lack of sleep and recognizing child’s need, reassures child’s fear and safety at night waking, adds additional bonding time prior to sleep, and maintains boundary on child staying in his room.
⛔ As a trauma survivor, mom sets a boundary around her child climbing on her. She yells and demands her daughter not climb on her.
✅ As a trauma survivor, mom sets a boundary around her child climbing on her, recognizes her child’s need, gets support to work through her trauma, and suggests they hold hands instead.
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